Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
And then the night went full on bisexual.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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