i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize