and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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