So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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