Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
