I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
