I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
