So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
