Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Randomize
