Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Can I color on your dick again?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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