Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Randomize