Only a mothe r could love this liver
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.