New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
