I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize