Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
