I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
i out mim tonsoeep
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
