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I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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