I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Randomize
