Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
