yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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