every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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