we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Randomize
