if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
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And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
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Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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