why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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