you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
