I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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