benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
