The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
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