he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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