Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
