We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.