Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
