ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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