I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize