Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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