Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
me + whiskey = a bad person
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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