i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
