I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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