I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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