that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
