everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
