Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
