Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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