Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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