defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
