Even water is tasting like jack daniels
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
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