So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Randomize
