It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
