ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Randomize
