Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
