U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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