She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
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I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
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Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.