i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize